December Is Always Cold
by Chephirah95
Summary: This story is set two years prior to the book. It's from Johnny's P.O.V. He is kicked out of his house for a week and starving. He'll do just about anything to get a bite to eat.


_This story is set two years prior to the book. It's from Johnny's P.O.V. He is kicked out of his house for a week and starving. He'll do just about anything to get a bite to eat. I know I haven't posted in a while, but I wanted to try something a little darker for the Outsiders. I'm not sure if I will keep this as a one shot or add on to this later._

It's always cold in December. My jacket barely covered my arms and torso, so I hunched over trying to make my frame smaller than it was. I was standing on the corner of Hudson and Trent. There were only three types of people who hung around this street. Those who were buying drugs, those who were selling drugs, and those who were prostituting. I guess I was here for the last reason.

I've never been hungrier than I am now. My dad told me he had better not see me for a week. The Curtis' went fishing with their mom and dad so I was stuck on that end. I was going to go to Two-bit's, but I always feel uncomfortable asking him for stuff. His mom is the only one that works and she has two kids to feed. Steve went with the Curtis' and Dally was out running with Tim.

I had just turned 13 not too long ago. I looked for a job even though I knew no one would hire a kid. Especially a kid who looked about 10. I made eye contact with another kid a little older than me. We quickly walked in opposite directions. I had never done this before. I had never been so desperate before.

It wasn't long before a car stopped in front of me. I heard the younger you look the better. I figured if I made about $50 I could feed myself for a while and save the rest in case I got kicked out again.

"Get in kid." I must have looked spooked because he offered me $10 for a hand job. I know something so simple should have been half that price, but I was hungry and shame was not something that presently existed for me.

I looked around inside the car and it was nothing special. It had that used car smell though. I couldn't make eye contact with the guy. He grabbed my jaw and tilted my face up towards his.

"Pretty aren't ya kid? How old are you?" I could have said 13, but he would have thought I was lying anyways.

"11."

"Shit. You're a little younger than I like 'em. Well… get to it."

I unzipped his pants and pulled him out. I started to rub up and down his length. It was getting firm under my hand.

"Shit kid. Go slower. Put your hand around the head and twist down. Here." He moved his hand over mine to show me how to do it. After he was convinced that I knew what I was doing, he removed his hand. He was breathing really hard with his hand draped over his forehead.

"Say something kid. It's kind of weird with you looking at me with those big eyes."

"Say what?" That must have been enough because he finished on my hand. He pulled out a rag and wiped my hand off. I thought it would take longer. I thought I would chicken out before I got the money, but I didn't. He handed me a ten and pushed me out of his car.

I thought I was going to do this more than once, but I was wrong. I didn't have it in me. I went straight to the Dingo to get a combo, but when my food arrived I could barely open my mouth to eat it. My stomach hurt and my throat felt raw. I was starting to get choked up so I wolfed down my food and left.

I started walking aimlessly. My head was bent down and I was trying to stop the silent tears that trickled down my face.

"Hey! Johnny."

It was Dally. I tried to hurry up and wipe my face off, but I could tell he had already seen the tears. I knew he wouldn't directly ask about them though, and for that I was grateful.

"Your old man?"

I just shook my head. I really didn't feel like talking. We walked in silence for a few minutes before we found our way to the park. Nobody was there. We sat under the tree while Dally absently picked blades of grass. Just looking at Dally got me going again. I was choking back sobs and Dally looked worried. I never cried in front of him before. More importantly, he never cared if anybody cried in front of him before. I could tell he didn't know what to do.

"What the hell man? What is it? Your dad hittin' you again?"

"He-he kicked me out."

"For good?"

"No. For a week."

"Well if that's all, you can just crash with me at Buck's until the Curtis' get back." I wished that was all it was.

"I hadn't eaten for a week. I was so hungry."

"Well come on. We can go to the DX and get something."

"I'm not hungry. I can't eat."

"What? You just said you haven't eaten for a week. Get up Johnny let's go to the DX."

I felt the urgent need to confess to Dally. He was like a big brother to me. I never kept secrets from him before and I never lied to him. Dally never judged so I figured it was safe. I whispered where I had been.

"What? Speak up Johnnycakes I can't hear ya."

"I went to Hudson and Trent." Dally was quiet for 3 whole minutes.

"Johnny…"

"That's how I bought lunch." I wanted to stop talking because now I was feeling foolish. I had just told Dallas Winston that I prostituted myself for food.

"Johnny. What did he make you do?"

"Nothing. Just a hand job." My face was flushed and I wouldn't look at Dally. I wouldn't talk louder either.

"Do you remember the car?"

"No."

"Johnny think about it." I really didn't remember the car. I only looked at the inside for a few seconds.

"I don't remember it Dal." He was pacing now. He looked upset and asked me how much I got.

"$10." He breathed easier after that.

"So you didn't stay right? You only did that and left?"

"Yeah."

"You swear? Don't lie to me Johnny. I'll know if you do."

"I'm telling the truth. I-I couldn't do it no more."

"If you ever get hungry again come find me ok? You don't ever have to do that again alright?" I just nodded my head, but that wasn't good enough for Dal. He handed me a few bills and made me promise I wouldn't ever go down that street again.

"I promise."

I don't know why I'm surprised. Dally tells Mrs. Curtis everything and she tells Mr. Curtis everything. I noticed how they would stare at me when they thought I wasn't looking. A few days had passed and I guess Mr. Curtis couldn't hold it in anymore. He asked to talk to me outside. Everyone was a little confused, but they ignored it for the most part.

I looked at Dally, but his eyes were blank.

Mr. Curtis took my shoulder and guided me behind the house. I could tell he didn't want anybody eavesdropping.

"How ya doing Johnny?" Mr. Curtis' usually smiling eyes were dull now. He was talking to me like I was fragile.

I shrugged my shoulders. We both knew why he had called me out here.

"Sit down son. I want to talk to you." It's always easier talking to Mr. Curtis when he's sitting. I don't like when people bigger than me stand over me.

"You know you're always welcome here right? Even if we aren't here the door is always unlocked. Whatever you need just go ahead and get it ok?"

He was being nice by not outright saying anything. I guess he wanted me to bring it up first, but I wasn't going to. I couldn't.

"Johnny. I know what happened and you don't ever have to do that again. Do you hear me? Never again."

My eyes got red, but I wasn't crying.

I nodded my head. My voice wasn't working.

"Those men who use little boys. They're bad men Johnny. They could seriously hurt you if they wanted to." He didn't need to try and scare me. I know he was only being thorough, but I was never doing that again.

"I know you didn't have to do - more this time, but you never know."

I was crying now. I felt bad that I was getting this talk from Mr. Curtis and not my dad.

"I'm sorry."

He was quick to assure me that I had nothing to apologize for. Then he asked me if I remembered what the car looked like that I got in.

"I don't remember."

"I'm not mad Johnny. I just want to know."

"I didn't look. I just— you know."

"Ok. But if you think you remember just pull me aside and tell me ok? Or tell Dally and he'll make sure it gets back to me." I nodded my head that I understood. I could tell he thought I remembered the car and was just too afraid to tell him. It would be from then on that they would invite me to their little weekend trips. They would invite the other boys too.

We stayed outside a little longer until I pulled myself together. When I went back in I sat next to Dally. He leaned over and whispered in my ear.

"I only told Mrs. C so she could let ya know that you were welcome here anytime. I didn't tell nobody else." I caught Ponyboy looking at us curiously, but when he saw me watching him he turned around.

"I know man. I know you wouldn't tell nobody." He looked faintly relieved that I wasn't mad at him. After that we all went to eat and me and Dally never discussed it again. I also never went down Hudson and Trent again either.


End file.
